"It's safe! You all can come out now"

 It is a cold and rainy night here in St. Louis. I have been home since 1:00 this afternoon. There have been two weeks of insufficient lunchtime business, and the talk of cutbacks is prominent and in discussion. Where I lend my hand in the food and beverage industry, they have seen a dramatic drop in customer base. With the out-of-control economy, the holidays approaching fast and pocketbooks being held closed(due to fear) combined with the after-shock or letdown from the election, people have retreated and retreated deep into hiding; With the media, overstimulation, hype, and rhetoric people do not want to participate in anything. We all are waiting to see what's ahead of us. #baitedbreath #pinsandneedles #wingsandprayers

The financial lines have been drawn. You have money and you're not letting go of it or you don't have it and there is nothing you can do about it. Two different numeric entities sitting not so pretty where commerce is concerned. Taking my $85.00 to the grocery store yesterday, yielded me 4 bags of groceries. Mainstays and a few decent-sized meats I can stretch a few meals for me and the kid. I can eat for free at my gig so that helps a bit.  He forever is doordashing it! When you rely on tips to survive, I can only pray that the president sticks to his word over no taxes on those stipends! And once some of the fear-mongering is stopped with the new administration, with all sincerity, I hope Glenda the good witch appears, making that grand announcement, "It's safe! You all can come out now"

I have seen too many posts about how quiet everything has become where the political stances have ceased. All of the build-up and bashing of candidates have been silenced. My intuitive mind says a certain party has been held over a barrel and was told, that if they go away quietly, when the corruption (political, financial, and pharmaceutical) is all exposed, the blow will not be a shock because they know what is coming for them. (again my intuition says, the reveal will be more than most can handle) The awakened have lived through this nightmare and we have worked penniless and tired to uphold a standard of morals and ethics. {I do not know if my art and communication biz will ever make a comeback. I still hold out for hope}In the meantime, I remind myself, that I have marketable skills and I am needed in a capacity most would fall over doing what I have done over the last 16 years... 

I am done trying to prove points or justify how I do anything. I keep at it and I keep cutting off people who do not align or will not support my efforts. If you have done nothing with your life, do not come at mine! If your job has made you sick and fat... don't you dare tell me how to show up in mine! If you're hyped up on prescription pills so you can cope with the life you have chosen and continue to participate in... do not bash my tenacity for not giving up on my health and goals and what I am trying to achieve! The American dream is still there some now just have to fight harder for it!

On a funnier note, every single tarot card reader(which seems to be the only thing on my fyp) has said, money is coming! A huge windfall... all of my efforts are going to pay off FINALLY. They also have said, that an ex is returning ( I roll my eyes) please uh no... the reader continues to say, that huge apology that is 12+ years overdue is making its way back but through guilt and shame and addiction, there are no words to express anything and the karmic (his new supply) that has found her way into his life, he now finally after all these years is questioning every life choice he has ever made! {it takes a lot for me to laugh out loud but you should hear me laugh hysterically.} No b.tch he is yours now... and that prize ha! you pray for is the spawn of the devil. You ain't got no prize... you got the booby trap!

Let us face it the last 16 years of whatever cycle we have been in have wreaked havoc in all of our lives one way or another. In the last 6 of mine, there were some very good moments that I banked on the forever but avoidant behavior and attachments due to unresolved childhood traumas, work environment, and poor health choices put a complete kibosh on that fairytale... A woman can not romanticize a life that is not there to begin with. Especially when that person banks on escaping only to come back to what has made him sick... its sadistic behavior. #lifecoaching I can not emphasize It enough, to grow you must evolve and MOVE forward. It's called relationship progress! You can not remain in the same place! 

I am so busy focusing on what's next, I do not have the energy to look back. Eventually, I will meander into someone. I have no desire to go to dinner or to have drinks! I'm sorry I have to get home to my 400 dogs! LOL My sights right now are on keeping my head above water so I can move!!!! Take a trip! ( I am pissed I am not in Tennessee right now) and Continue on my own health journey so I can live to be 116 years old!

There is quite the hush all over the world right now... and America is center stage. In the meantime though... it won't last forever and I can say rightly, the shoe is not going to drop! We all have waited a long time for this to prevail...

We just each have to keep showing up!!!

Kitryn Marie






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