Pretty In Pink... Perfect In Paisley!

I do not have all the answers. ( don't want to) I, like the other, 7 billion people on this earth who have opinions often speak them. ( I am ok with others not agreeing with me.) I am not high maintenance but I have standards that come with some pretty steep expectations. I typically stay to myself not causing any undue duress to anyone. I focus on things that are really important [my studies, my health, my kids and my business]and what makes me be a better individual that I can apply in my life and for the ones that I teach.  I draw lines and create boundaries because I have learned in the cruelest of ways what I will allow and tolerate in my life so I am and stay protected. I study, I research... I try to broaden my surroundings as well as broaden my mind. I despise narrow mindedness and people who see things through tunnel vision. Linear vision creates harsh narratives because the person refuses to see how their tunnel vision creates a scenario that only benefits them. For my

You can not heal in the environment in which has made you sick, cynical, self-righteous or judgemental. You can not be self-serving, thinking you are doing yourself justice if you are despising the people and the task you are assigned to deal with. You can not complain about what you are paid to do if that weekly paycheck is something you are living for and you certainly can not expect everyone to understand your motives if you are on the sidelines observing all actions that are taking place in silence still but yet doing nothing to change that environment in which has made you sick. Self-care will look so selfish to anyone who is trying to impose their way of thinking, living, acting and breathing for that matter if it does not coincide with their personal agenda at the time of (sharing s-p-a-c-e.) In order to heal from any toxic situation, one just has to stop participating, stop playing along and stop trying to keep themself in a situation, place, spot, position that will not allo

Recently I had the opportunity to drive through my old neighbor. I needed to drop off gifts and return a few belongings to a friend. The short drive over through the old hood, bittersweet. I just kept hearing over and over in my head love is a battlefield. The love of that neighborhood, the decline of the residents and the dilapidated environment from those who refuse to leave because it is only what they know. To start again, digging up roots, refinancing new mortgages and taking on new people, places and things would be a scary disadvantage for those that are stuck with misery. Driving past my old house, I could hear the ghosts of 1005 Bates cry out. They too stuck between walls, stories from a turbulent past and decades of one family's traumas. I am glad I moved. I am thankful for the opportunity that I was able to leave it behind. Bittersweet. It was not but a few months back someone was murdered on that front lawn. My old house that now has but one more ghost... chilling.

As I am slowly at a snail's pace and a turtle's crawl making my way back to some sort of work order, I 've been going through school notes and combing through a few random emails from people. I have been taught to pick apart sentences and read between the lines and be in tune with what I feel is real and what the person is not saying to convey all truths. The human mind will make up so many versions of the truth to compensate for behavior so it will come out like a truth when in fact it has been fabricated in the worst way. It's not so much that others will believe but if they tell a version that sounds so convincing to themself... they know for sure someone else will buy what's been said. A lie told like a truth is still a lie no matter which verbiage is used. I have been trained to pick apart the stories and use what I know not as a weapon or not as revenge [as if to throw someone under the bus] nor to use their misfortunes or maladies against them but to talk t

While I am still in the process of finding my speaking voice, for my lives and my YOUTUBE channel, I still have the many words that are filtering through my mind for web content. My plan was, for speaking, to take off til Jan 15th but as it looks it may take a bit longer. There is quite the gift in remaining silent and the ability to go unnoticed. Right now it physically hurts to talk to people. My brain makes this high pitch decibel sound that rattles my core. The public at large is getting worse and a few that have been in my circle... block, delete and what's your name? Trust me this vow of silence is doing everyone a world of good! January and February, in general, can be such a healing time. The refocusing on health and getting rid of some holiday unmerited weight. The balancing of finances and seeing exactly where you are at and what you can cut back on for this new year in order to save. Its a reorganizing of "home" closets, drawers, tools, and crafts spaces; To