Pretty In Pink... Perfect In Paisley!

 I have come to the realization that my expectations towards what I see for my life is unrealistic TO MANY! My simple 3-7-13 acre dream, raising a few 3 head of cattle, rescuing horses and rehabilitating them, and having chickens and some french geese to roam freely is obscure: Of course, choosing to Need a donkey to secure the property is insane,  as goats add to the merriment seems ludicrous to those that have been told by society...just work your 9-5 and grocery shop like everyone else this is what we have deemed for you, so follow the orders! I have had this dream as far back as I can remember! As a kid, my gram would say, "Kit we are city people. We do not have farms! As I approach the arousing age of 62, the dream still holds! Nothing has changed!  Except, Well I now own a horse! I put the horse before the cart knowing the rest will follow! I see it very clearly. I can feel it down deep within my soul. I can describe it down to the structures, beams, and nails. I ca...

 

 I live in what I call the flats of Affton Mo. A no-nothing area that houses a hodgepodge of homes, an array of ethnic groups, a cluster of families, a few schools, a main library, a couple of decent eateries, a handful of outdated bars, and a stretch of a mile that has tried to bring back something that resembles existence in a community; And let's not forget a lodge that sports a huge bronze animal that states they care thru the cash they take in thru cheap drinks in a bar... I mean lounge that supports the club. (more on that later). I've lived in this house for 17 years. This 972 sq ft shoebox has housed 3 children at different stages in their lives; with my youngest 22, still here. {My baby... leave it alone!} I have had numerous sized pets occupy space, my bed, my yard and my heart in these small quarters with 3 of them buried in my back yard. All are placed strategically amongst a garden. Knowing they are there is comforting but yet hauntingly, it hurts. My home was to b...

 I am sitting here this morning going over quite a few scenarios in my head. The psychological issues associated with money and those that attach to that mighty dollar. Once someone told me,  "If you can't be happy you might as well make money" Where I think if you have nothing else to concentrate on or if you live your life in lack, or if somehow you were told as a child "if you do not have a measurable amount of the greens... you are not worth anything!" or is it your fear of not having it, nothing to keep you secure, stable or validated that keeps you in a perpetual motion of chasing it. Money leaves you with the ease of convenience but it does not make who you are as a person. I watched my dad chase that dollar til he had so much that when he died; he really did want to take it with him. His own validation came down to how much money he could acquire. It was his own insecurity of having nothing growing up & he became obsessed with its commodities so it s...

 Psychology has many facets of life; the intricate weaves of birth order, generational curses, and how being product of environments plays out throughout all of our lives. As the oldest of 2 but the oldest out of 5 cousins that lived in close proximity, I took a separate path. I have always been more of an observer. In a house full of chaos, separating myself from some of the madness, all of my inquiries, information or general thoughts where I have sought some solution has always come in the silence. As the oldest, the one who had the most expectations from the elders, it was impeded that my path be separate to lead. The only problem was once I realized I was not like them... I tried with every ounce of stubbornness to separate from the herd. I never wanted to belong but there I was stuck in the middle of loud, crazy and heritage commotion. Generational curses... The first 5 years of a child's life imprints the next 15 years of things to come. Influence and who makes the most impa...

 I think where I last left you, last blog post, I was stepping back. I was changing things, redirecting, grabbing my camera and heading... SOMEWHERE! As an entrepreneur, you get to change it as many times as you desire! You wear many hats, many glasses, switch up products and you get to offer as many services as you are talented to do! Since our last visit, I rejoined AVON and re-signed with the Gourmet Cupboard. I also am waiting on status to be a brand ambassador for l'ange hair products and tools! I have ordered new business cards for my photography, I had another art show and I had a fabulous painting class that I taught for 11 women! I had 4 brand new tires put on my car and again had some exhaust issues fixed on the vehicle that at this time, I am keeping instead of trying to maintain a new car payment. That may have more to do with new car payment vs horse board! I said I was stepping back but it looks like I just went in another direction... AGAIN! The podcast set up I had ...