Some Only See For How They Wish It To Be
There are people in love that are not together. There are people not in love that are together and then there are those that are going through the motions hoping somewhere along the line it is going to work out. That one-sided relationship where someone sees things for how they hope it's going to turn out to be. They do not see the situation for how it is because they refuse to see it... for how it really is. False hope is a dangerous creature. Unrequited love is full of just that.
**We have also a "group" of people who are together for convenience. Money is the factor, someone is providing a roof and there is some forcible action that is constantly held over their counterparts head. "But I did this for you." If it wasn't for me you wouldn't have" "Because of me, your life is better... that's only if you go along with my PLAN and PLAY by my rules" "You can't leave. You have nowhere to go" "You can't afford a life without me" It is the cruelest form of emotional hostage one can play!
Autonomy: Freedom from external control or influence; Independent
I just returned from a four day trip with my person. (see Grey's Anatomy for that definition) What I thought would be a 4-day retreat for clarity, a little r&r, a few sights and a sense of refreshed was just the opposite; I came down with the flu and it put quite the damper on the little excursion. I was able to make a full day out of 1 day, muddled through the next and the following days what I will call not worth the trip. I was bed bound and sadly weak enough that I ended up laying on the bathroom floor with no energy to get up. Thankful he was there but not liking the dependency of being cared for. (through no fault of his) I just don't like being hovered over. I have no need to be mothered. Circumstances and situations... I make a terrible patient. (I will leave that just like that) If any of you have not realized as of yet, I DO NOT want to be dependent on ANYONE for any reason. Playing damsel in distress is not one of my better qualities. Yes at times we all need a little assistance here and there but I have known women who have made it their schtick to always be in crisis and chaos! and their dependence on a man goes way beyond any form of "love".
I decided a few short years ago after having the rug pulled out from underneath me and my world turning upside down, that I will NEVER leave my health, happiness or my financial situation in another man's hand. That is just me. I can not speak for anyone else but I will call out someone else's bullshit on the matter. If, In order to be in love, you need to lose yourself, your dignity and or any of your belongings to another... no thanks! For better or worse, I can go it with my pride intact and no one telling me "not as long as you are with me!"
From all of my coaching courses, I have learned: I wish I could tell people "you are going to get what you want." I wish I could tell people "sure it is going to work out" I wish I could tell people, "wishful people always get the love they hope for" but I can not nor will I lie and pretend to make niceties over it. Learn to see the situation for what it is... and take responsibility ONLY for how you feel. That though does not make the other person responsible or obligated for your feelings! It is on YOU!
This I will say, "You can not force your way into anyone's life." You can't force someone to want the same thing you want...just because you want it" "Just because you feel that... that does not mean the other person feels the same or should have to go along with it." "If that person is not capable of feeling something see it for how it really is and then respect that the person for acknowledging a truth." Quit trying to force an issue or creating a spot in that person's life because you want it! (The trauma of betrayal, and abuse in any matter, will ultimately change the dynamics of that person's heart severely affecting the brain and capacity in which they will love again: often it results in never having "that type of feeling again" that part was stolen and it can't be recovered.) If intimacy has declined or there is no merit for it, you can not force someone to feel something where there is no desire. Just because you want intimacy, closeness or sex; its because of what you are needing from the relationship. It goes back to just because you feel that... that does not mean by obligation the other person has to also! See the situation for how it... and stop pretending it is going to get better! Mental trust: That person had the person they were the closest to... To be put in that situation again being that vulnerable and trusting most often does not ever occur again. That trust was obliviated and the way it had to heal itself does not need to be defended to anyone.
The complications of all relationships, you are lucky if some components of love go the way that you really think it is going to go. A hopeful heart does not guarantee you, love. A foolish mind only sees what it wants to see! Young love does not exist in an aged heart. That youthful reminder of what love should be isn't! An older person's eyes and heart are much more aware of the intricacy that goes along with "coupleship" The person who has been on their own for a while usually finds no need at all to allow someone to occupy space on a regular/permanent basis. AUTONOMY: Freedom from external control or influence. INDEPENDENT!
As I recover from this flu and I am slowly getting my "act" together and booking coaching sessions if you would like to learn more about my services visit kitryn-marie.weebly.com if you are interested in any of my art classes or merchandise go over to kmgraphicapparelandart.weebly.com
All inquiries are welcome you can email me kitrynmarie@gmail.com
Follow me KM Designs -AWriters_Mind on all the social networks, like, share and please leave a comment.
We live in a time where everyone should have the freedom to express and live for their highest good. Look at your own self and values, come to terms with what you really are needing in your life and pursue those that match that same desire. You can not turn a sow's ear into a silk purse because you say it will be.
Meet Me In St. Louis
Kitryn Marie
#lifecoach #personalmentoring #businesscoaching #creativemindset #artlessons
**We have also a "group" of people who are together for convenience. Money is the factor, someone is providing a roof and there is some forcible action that is constantly held over their counterparts head. "But I did this for you." If it wasn't for me you wouldn't have" "Because of me, your life is better... that's only if you go along with my PLAN and PLAY by my rules" "You can't leave. You have nowhere to go" "You can't afford a life without me" It is the cruelest form of emotional hostage one can play!
Autonomy: Freedom from external control or influence; Independent
I just returned from a four day trip with my person. (see Grey's Anatomy for that definition) What I thought would be a 4-day retreat for clarity, a little r&r, a few sights and a sense of refreshed was just the opposite; I came down with the flu and it put quite the damper on the little excursion. I was able to make a full day out of 1 day, muddled through the next and the following days what I will call not worth the trip. I was bed bound and sadly weak enough that I ended up laying on the bathroom floor with no energy to get up. Thankful he was there but not liking the dependency of being cared for. (through no fault of his) I just don't like being hovered over. I have no need to be mothered. Circumstances and situations... I make a terrible patient. (I will leave that just like that) If any of you have not realized as of yet, I DO NOT want to be dependent on ANYONE for any reason. Playing damsel in distress is not one of my better qualities. Yes at times we all need a little assistance here and there but I have known women who have made it their schtick to always be in crisis and chaos! and their dependence on a man goes way beyond any form of "love".
I decided a few short years ago after having the rug pulled out from underneath me and my world turning upside down, that I will NEVER leave my health, happiness or my financial situation in another man's hand. That is just me. I can not speak for anyone else but I will call out someone else's bullshit on the matter. If, In order to be in love, you need to lose yourself, your dignity and or any of your belongings to another... no thanks! For better or worse, I can go it with my pride intact and no one telling me "not as long as you are with me!"
From all of my coaching courses, I have learned: I wish I could tell people "you are going to get what you want." I wish I could tell people "sure it is going to work out" I wish I could tell people, "wishful people always get the love they hope for" but I can not nor will I lie and pretend to make niceties over it. Learn to see the situation for what it is... and take responsibility ONLY for how you feel. That though does not make the other person responsible or obligated for your feelings! It is on YOU!
This I will say, "You can not force your way into anyone's life." You can't force someone to want the same thing you want...just because you want it" "Just because you feel that... that does not mean the other person feels the same or should have to go along with it." "If that person is not capable of feeling something see it for how it really is and then respect that the person for acknowledging a truth." Quit trying to force an issue or creating a spot in that person's life because you want it! (The trauma of betrayal, and abuse in any matter, will ultimately change the dynamics of that person's heart severely affecting the brain and capacity in which they will love again: often it results in never having "that type of feeling again" that part was stolen and it can't be recovered.) If intimacy has declined or there is no merit for it, you can not force someone to feel something where there is no desire. Just because you want intimacy, closeness or sex; its because of what you are needing from the relationship. It goes back to just because you feel that... that does not mean by obligation the other person has to also! See the situation for how it... and stop pretending it is going to get better! Mental trust: That person had the person they were the closest to... To be put in that situation again being that vulnerable and trusting most often does not ever occur again. That trust was obliviated and the way it had to heal itself does not need to be defended to anyone.
The complications of all relationships, you are lucky if some components of love go the way that you really think it is going to go. A hopeful heart does not guarantee you, love. A foolish mind only sees what it wants to see! Young love does not exist in an aged heart. That youthful reminder of what love should be isn't! An older person's eyes and heart are much more aware of the intricacy that goes along with "coupleship" The person who has been on their own for a while usually finds no need at all to allow someone to occupy space on a regular/permanent basis. AUTONOMY: Freedom from external control or influence. INDEPENDENT!
As I recover from this flu and I am slowly getting my "act" together and booking coaching sessions if you would like to learn more about my services visit kitryn-marie.weebly.com if you are interested in any of my art classes or merchandise go over to kmgraphicapparelandart.weebly.com
All inquiries are welcome you can email me kitrynmarie@gmail.com
Follow me KM Designs -AWriters_Mind on all the social networks, like, share and please leave a comment.
We live in a time where everyone should have the freedom to express and live for their highest good. Look at your own self and values, come to terms with what you really are needing in your life and pursue those that match that same desire. You can not turn a sow's ear into a silk purse because you say it will be.
Meet Me In St. Louis
Kitryn Marie
#lifecoach #personalmentoring #businesscoaching #creativemindset #artlessons
